I have returned!

Today meets with Momma Monster, who, as promised, forgot all about her bloggy-blog and ditched you guys for ohhhhhhh more than a year or so. Along with Momma Monster, Big Monster (who is now almost 7), Little Monster (who is, canyoubelieveit, 17 months already!), and Big Daddy Monster, we also have the addition of a new monster, Big Big Monster, our 11 (almost 12) year old niece who has come to live with us. She's been living with us for around a year now, and it has taken some adjusting (3 kids is more than 2, let's just leave it at that!), but we love her to death and are enjoying having her here.

Not only that, but Momma Monster is working (a Preschool teacher, as if I don't get enough of children at home!) and Big Daddy Monster owns his own business and is doing pretty darn well! Momma's sister is also living with the Monster Clan for now, until she gets on her own, and now you've met the new and improved (and much MUCH bigger!) Monster Clan.

Life as a working momma with a Work-At-Home daddy is...well, let's just say it's a little bit different than the life I imagined I would have. SAHD/WAHD are getting a lot more media attention nowadays (I LOVE those Tide commercials with the daddy washing his daughter's princess costume!), but it is still an adjustment, especially considering that my husband is born-and-bred Mexicano (and proud of it!) and Mexicans tend to be a bit more...lets just say...chauvenistic about their gender roles. However, for the moment, we've found something that works for us, even if we have to work each and every second at keeping the house and the children in line and under control, lest the whole thing come tumbling down at our feet.

One way that we keep our system in line is family meetings. There is no set date/time for family meetings, but one of the family members will set one up when the need for one is felt. The reason that family meetings are so important to all of us is that it is a place of amnesty: a place where we can let our true feelings and opinions shine without fear of repercussions. I want my children to feel like part of our household, not just dolls to sit and look pretty, so I want them to feel that their opinions are wanted, even if we don't necessarily give them everything they want.

Our last family meeting was called because Daddy and I were feeling very overworked. Although we had a system of chores in place, it felt like nothing was getting done, and what was getting done was by a series of threats, yelling, fighting, and sending of children to bed early. I don't want to have to scream and punish my children when I want them to do something. I want them to do it because they understand their choices and the consequences to those choices. So that was the theme to our meeting: Choices. We implemented a new system of chores where, instead of chores changing daily, each child has one hard-ish chore and one easy-ish chore. All chores are basic, no deep cleaning required, and must be done nightly after dinner (twice a day on weekends and other non-school days). We discussed that doing chores was a CHOICE. However, like all choices in life, their choice has consequences, both positive and negative. Not doing our chore would result in a negative consequence of being "grounded" the following day, which means no fun activities. Any reading must be done in a non-fiction book. They may practice math or other workbook-type activities, they may write essays, they may lie down and stare at the ceiling, but they may not do any enjoyable activities. The positive consequence of doing their chore is that the next day, they have the privledge of being allowed to do things like go to the park, play outside, play with toys, draw, read fiction, or watch television. Once these consequences were agreed upon, it was written and we moved on.

We also discussed respect at length. To me, the problem with kids nowadays (let me put on my old-lady voice here) is that they have no respect for their elders. Not that I expect my children to say "Yes Ma'am" to everything I say, but I do expect for them to speak to their elders with respect, as well as being respectful to everyone around them. One way that my children tend to disrespect is by lying (Big Monster) and Backtalking/Eye-rolling (Big Big Monster). We discussed the consequences, both positive and negative to these actions, and decided that the positive consequence would be praise and/or mutual trust and the negative would be a drop of soap on our tongue, to remind us to wash the lies and/or disrespect away. This was also agreed to and written down.

Finally, we discussed the issue of not listening. This seems to be more of an issue with Big Monster than the others; probably an age issue, but we do have an issue with them not feeling like listening to us the first time we tell them to do something. Now, during this, Daddy Monster and I also agreed that when we want something done, we need to remember not to ask, because asking implies a choice. We have to make our command clear, and make it clear that it is a command and not a choice. If I forget to do so, or it doesn't seem clear to the child the first time, I say very clearly "I told you to.... This was not a question or an option. It was a direction. Please follow it." and usually that solves the problem. This also works with my Preschool kids when they choose not to listen. The positive consequence to listening is more trust as well as more priviledges (e.g. When they go to bed the first time asked, they get to stay up a bit later because I know I don't have to fight with them to go to bed later). The negative consequence is time-out. Now, normal time-outs do not work for children as old as ours. At the Preschool, sitting a child on the side of a room for a few minutes works without a problem in most circumstances. However, with a 7 and a 12 year old, we must get creative. We agreed that a little discomfort was necessary to make sure the point about listening got across, so the children must sit with their hands in the air for the 5 minute time-out. Please, don't think I'm cruel. They do not have to hold them all the way up, just with their hands in the air to remind them that they're in time-out. In a grocery store, where sitting them in a corner is not a viable option, they must put their hands in the air and walk quietly along with us until the 5 minutes are up. This was also written.

Once all household rules were written and agreed upon, each family member signed the paper, and we posted it as a reminder to our agreement.

It's been a couple of weeks since we had our last family meeting, and it has made a difference. Especially in the frustration level of Daddy and Momma Monster. Instead of having to yell, I just remind the children that they have the choice to follow directions or not, but if not, this is the consequence. In most cases, they follow. Now that Aunty Monster is living with us, though, it's time for another meeting. :)

Thanks for reading, and I hope to be back again tomorrow!

Momma Monster Out!

Hot Cheetos Chicken

Daddy Monster was late from work today, and wanted to go out when he got home, but our "normal" dinnertime was upon us, and we were hungry, so I decided to throw something together. I had some chicken breasts thawed in the fridge, and had this great recipe pinned, and thus Hot Cheetos Chicken was born.
I used this recipe from food.com as a jumping off point.
First, I took a small bag of baked Cheetos (extra awesome, because they were free!) and threw them in the blender with a few Tbs of parmesan cheese, and pulsed it until it was all crumbled, I emptied it out onto a plate, then I did the same thing with a big handful of Hot Cheetos. I emptied that out on a plate, gave an egg a quick scramble in a bowl, and poured about a cup of flour on another plate. Once I had my assembly line set up, I butterflied my chicken (yes, it isn't that pretty, but I'm not looking for points for presentation a la Chopped or anything :), dipped it in the egg, into the flour, into the egg again, and then into the Cheetos crumbs. A small breast into the baked Cheetos for Big Monster and a slightly bigger one into the hot Cheetos for Momma Monster. I heated some vegetable oil over medium heat and then cooked the chicken until it was brownish and crispy on the outside.
Verdict: Yum! The baked Cheetos one had a far milder flavor than the hot Cheetos one, but the hot Cheetos one had no spicyness whatsoever. The hot Cheetos one was quite a bit more greasy though. They were both really good, even Big Monster (pickiest eater on the face of the PLANET!!!) finished her whole portion. I'll definitely be making them again!



The Assembly Line

And introducing....

Hello, all out there in blogland. It is I, the notorious blog-starter-and-never-finisher, also known as Amanda! As you can tell by this ever-awesome nickname, I have a horrid, horrid habit. Well, I`m here today to make an honest effort to change. Of course, it`s not like I`m not busy enough as it is, what with two little monsters, a husband, school, and working on making our business venture a success, but I'm nothing if not ambitious! Plus, with Blogger's mobile app, i can blog while rock-a-bying Little Monster to sleep, since the darling child who i love so much refuses to sleep unless she's being held.
So, as I sit here at naptime (aka "lay down quietly or you go to bed early" time, in the case of Big Monster) browsing Pinterest and following the maze of connections through the Blogosphere, I have a thousand million ideas shooting through my head, and i want to share. So, i hope this will be a place where you can enjoy stories of my successes and even of my failures, and maybe share yours too. I can't wait to chronicle the things i sew, the food i cook, the crafts i make, and, i hope at some point, the adventures i have with my monsters.
About me? Well, I recently turned 25 years old, and I'm quite obsessed with making stuff. I love to create, must be the Pisces in me. I'm not very funny to most people (although I crack myself up, lol!), but I do love to laugh. I love to cook and may not have the cleanest house in the world (or even in my neighborhood) and I'm okay with that...sometimes. I've been married almost 6 years to one of the only people who "get" me Big Daddy Monster, and we have two Monsters together: Big Monster is 5 1/2 going on 30, and Little Monster is 2 1/2 months.
I hope you all enjoy my blog!
Tonight for dinner: Cheetos Chicken. I'll let you know how it turns out :-)

Momma Monster out